i roughly paragraph my conclusion for my 8 days Egypt trip during my last day there. comparing to my several trips before, let alone this trip-note to be my first piece that I successfully publish here. so, here it is.
Sinai ; An Unraveled Quest.
1) we walked on the land full with histories. the past histories that once occurred there seem to be connected with our present moments, in so many unfathomable ways. how perfectly Allah encapsulated Musa's life and struggling moments, here. This piece of parched land consists of every single part of his remains, regardless of the presence of the physical remains or not. Well, memories live in moments and times, they say.
the land of Egypt is truly a validate proof that Allah will never ever abandon us. if there's anyone who'll know our drained souls, its no one but Him. He knows that we've tried, He knows that we're scared of what might happen, He knows our fear of rejection, he knows what makes us intimidated and what makes us degenerated. and all that He asked Musa, and all of us to do was to settle our hand to the chest, inni ma'akuma asma'u wa ara. He consoles our shivers with His soothing coax, that He's there with us, listening and witnessing. He's indeed there with every utterance of pain and strangles of emotions. He just wants us to, believe. and don't ever be afraid to step forward. to be scared of anything is normal, that proves our limitations and bringing us to the realisation that what wholes us is our faith and trust, to Him. and only Him.
thus, whats the reason to give up? to step back? none.
2) i'll never forget the silent whisper i secretly muttered, with eyes locked to the Qarun's lake. may i'll not be strayed by any means of disobediences. may everything that He bestowed me upon will just cascade me down towards the very basis, to savour and devour more and more pleasant vaults and bounties in His paradise. Allahuma 'jalni 'abdan syakura.
3) faith and trust. the wondering on how Musa's mom obediently and religiously flows Musa along Sungai Nil is truly perplexing. and her faith to Allah's promise of returning her son back surpassing anything else and then to faithfully place Musa down and handing him to the ultimate shield and protection of Allah. it stifles me much more to think about her emotion on the very moment she's about to lay Musa down and let the cradle rivers. then all she could do was just watching the cradle streams away till it's far from to be sought. i just...cant. Allah describes it well in surah al-Qasas how unsettled and numbed the feeling of the mother. just then Allah revealed the plan that He had decreed upon to the which He'll certainly reunite both of them. He certainly will.
He just want us to, believe.
3 of us were so emotionally overwhelmed by this story along our Sg Nil cruise.
and it'll never cease to be forgotten :)
4) so, for the presence of this two trip mates, i thank Allah for converging our paths together. misunderstand sehari dua tu normal lah kan. haha
5) we thank people for the memories created along being together, but we will never compromise and cross any boundaries distinguishing friendliness and alienity. feigning indifference is somehow a perfect distinctive feature one could have. luls
6) perhaps we can elate our emotion to the utmost exhilarating joyousness and happiness, yet we can never deny that our mind still has its own preferable unnoticeable way to drift. and when it did it'll eventually found the same thing all over again. just then you know you're whorled by your thoughts, how spiralled you are and you were to certain particular memories, moments and person.
7) how people could be so unimaginably kind-hearted? thank you akhawats :) none of you haven't taught me that being a stranger is not that scary though
8) Egypt is undoubtedly rich with soooo many resources and lucrative incomes for the country. just imagine how Suez Canal can actually elevate Egypt to a higher standard of economic distinction and a proper socio-economic. so its devastatingly frustrating that the corruptions here and there, voids and breach of trust, mismanagements and crisis forcefully forcing the innocence to be the pawn of the game and inevitably creating chaotic life phenomena of the citizen from the politics imposed by the authoritarian power of the 'leaders'. its unfair. and its ridiculous.
9) on the other hand, theres a group struggling for their people's worth and drenching every part of them for the sake of reviving the withered and wilt islamic spirit, the wavering and weariness of egyptian people. i've been in their manhaj ever since i was born, but only when i witnessed the historical effects of it, was the unforgettable moment when i regain my senses. had it not been because of the land that witnessed their struggle and blood, i'll not fell the way i'm feeling right now. so whats exactly i'm feeling aaa? haha.
10) i discovered my slight sight disability in Alex. and i feel very buta you know. so yeah, i'm with spectacles now.
11) i enjoyed the nature, the sea breeze, the mountains very much. never failed to be entranced by the golden syrup of the sky. which obviously couldn't be put to words.
12) oh and one more, we didn't visit Giza because we didn't feel like it. haha. well. siapa kata pergi mesir memang kena tengok benda bentuk pyramid itu?
regardless the flu i had on the last day, the day i wrote this;
i've created memories, alhamdulillah.
till then (:
ps: i didn't tell my parents that i still have to sit a paper a day after my trip. exam postpone disebabkan salju sonata. nasib baik score subject postpone itu. heh.